oracle_knows

I got about a half of that file before he crashed the Bat-Computer on me. Unfortunately the way he'd encrypted it meant that I couldn't decrypt without the entire file being present. Last time I checked, it was stored on a standalone computer in the Batcave, hidden behind the Penny (there being an effective natural Faraday cage there). But he may have moved it since then.

From:

mrsarcastic003

Damn and damnation. I can check that computer, though. Sometimes, I come in early from patrol.

From:

Ooh. Ow.

Your therapist lookin' to make their career with you, too? Mine's already plannin' the book I think.

From:

Of course not! My therapist left the room ten minutes before the end of my last therapy session and refused to come back. Her recommendation was, and I quote "... that she be transferred to the care of Dr. Harleen Quinzel, who could not possibly be vulnerable to any further ill effects. Failing this, although I can hardly consider this a strong recommendation given their level of success, someone with experience of the residents of Arkham" (she didn't specify whether she meant Asylum or Dunwich*) would be better suited to handling this patient than most of our regular staff."

Instead, I am to be transferred to the care of Dr. Stanley Keyworth**. And my old therapist is now in therapy herself.

* OOC note: Arkham, Dunwich is the setting for many of H.P. Lovecraft's stories.
** OOC note 2: Josh Lyman's therapist in The West Wing (thank you Google).

From:

....

Holy God you're good, girl.

Mine's makin' her career outta me... she doesn't believe me, and she finds me an 'exquisite mass of contradictions'.

Almost did put me in Arkham, though. But Wilson came and picked me up so she didn't.

She thinks I'm crazy. Well, maybe I am, but not the way she thinks I am.

From:

Not that good. Just an inexperienced therapist and a triage system that said that things weren't serious because I don't dress up in a silly costume to either commit or fight crime. And didn't think to ask whether I ever have and whether I miss it.

And that book she's starting to write is entertaining. Want a copy of the half dozen chapters she's written?

From:

Sure, why not? Wait, your therapist, or mine?

From:

Yours. Mine only lasted two sessions before she pressed me to tell her about the Joker.

From:

She's already six in? wow.

Mm. Mine's always goin' on about how I'm projecting onto the clown.

And is always after more on my mom and how she's connected to him.

I haven't really seen her since I killed him. Wonder what she'll say.

And whatcha think about my idealizing the father figure that saved me into Batman and then that father figure failed me because of my mother and then I died? That was confusin'.

...and if she tries to get me to use the lift one more time I'm throwing a pen at her.

From:

Oh dear. I'd better check something.

...

It's as bad as I'd suspected. In the last couple of months she's bought Gotham: 20th Century Mythology, A History of Fake Murders from Jack the Ripper to The Joker, and Batman, Odysseus, and King Arthur - the Search for Greatness. She's one of these cranks who doesn't believe in the existence of Batman or Gotham's nightlife. And has been buying books since you started counselling with her to try to reinforce that belief.

But if you want amusement, try working out what her questions tell you about her. And avoid any regression crap - recovered memories are generally fictitious.

From:

*snorts* She doesn't believe in the Night? Lovely. Well, that'll help with the keeping of the secret, I guess.

Oh, that could be fun...

and I avoid regression. I try and ignore stuff. Works fine for me.

From:

Oh, she believes in the Night. Just not Gotham's.

And if you want real fun, get a copy of Batman, Odysseus, and King Arthur. Helena, Zinda and I wrote it together (well, Helena and I tore apart each others' drafts while Zinda played peacemaker) as something to distract us from the so-called Jade Canary. It's riddled with in-jokes and amongst other things manages to rationalise away every single confirmed Batman sighting.

From:

Hm. Whose Night does she believe in? the dark night of mankind's soul? .....

actually, she would...

Holy shit, I'm gonna get that from the library! That sounds good.

*snickers*

Does it deal with numbering the Robins problems?

From:

Which numbering Robins problems - the Robins that don't exist? Actually it comes to the conclusion that Robin has always been female but (like the Principal Boy in the pantomime) needed the fiction that Robin was male in order to be taken seriously pre-Feminism. There's a depressingly un-blurry photo of Steph that needed tying in - and Short-pants old costume needed explaining away.

Oh, and the Robins that are very occasionally seen with the Titans are a rolling cover identity used for plausible deniability by someone who shouldn't be there.

Regrettably we couldn't quite make the theory that Arrowette turned into a Robin briefly work.

From:

Yeah, those Robins. And... heh. Heh heh heh... BAHAHAHAAAAA!!!! The shortpants, oh, wow... heh.... and how come they got a clear shotta Girl-Robin? Any good not- Tim shots of Robins?

Ooh. That works.

From:

Steph always was a little on the careless side, and it's a lot harder to dodge cameras now than it used to be. And shots of Tim were matched up to that pervert who took theatrical school kids, dressed them up as Robins, and killed them. The first shot of Tim (there are a couple) was explained away as being the first male hooker he'd asked to dress as Robin.

And there are only about two paragraphs explaining how between his time as Speedy and as Arsenal, Red Arrow was in Robin's costume. Helena won that little competition by fitting ten double entendres into two lines without disrupting the passage.

From:

Mm, yeah, I know. Someone got a shot of me after... well, after. No, not Tim as Robin pictures... TIM'S pictures, the ones he took of me and Dick.

...I'm applying for the library card now.

Dick got me ID! I exist. Kinda weird.

From:

Oh, you mean other real ones. In that case, I've actually published quite a lot of them on the internet. Almost all showing clear evidence at different levels of being photoshopped - with one of my aliases deliberately improving after each analysis came back that the picture was a fake. With so many known fakes of different standards, new ones are assumed to be fake. I've even slipped a couple of real ones in there that are thought to be fake. There's even a newsgroup for them - news://alt.binaries.pictures.batman - and they even made me its moderator.

And there's also my set of Bruce and Dick*. And Hugo Strange's one we had to replace.

* Confusing continuities - Golden age Babs discovered for herself as I describe, in the Silver Age it wasn't a big secret, in the Modern Age, Ostrander believed she never knew, but Batman showed her himself in Batgirl Year One.

From:

...you are devious. And smart. Fuck, woman. You've missed your calling.

From:

Oh? What do you think my calling is?

From:

No fricken' clue.

...maybe it does. Information broker. But I dunno. There's so much you could do.

From:

I think the combination of spymaster, information broker, and hacker fits me as well as anything I could do in this stupid chair. Except possibly politics?

OOC: Questions about calling make Oracle-mun twitch even if Oracle-muse is happy with hers.

From:

Politics, no, girl, not for you. You're too good for that, to my mind at lease. And I think it suits you fine, but maybe write some more or something.

Dunno. Just sometimes it seems the Night gets too many bright, smart people and doesn't let 'em see day.

OOC- oh? why?

From:

If no one good does it, how are we ever going to improve the stock of politicians?

OOC: Because I'm still not sure what I should be doing. I'm much closer than I was six months ago, and that was a massive improvement over eighteen months ago (hell, just about anything except arms dealer would have been an improvement over that pointless year). But still not nearly there. And I've got a housemate (and ex) with a clear vocation who's following it.

From:

You really don' want my answer to that little probem.

OOC- Oh. Agh.

From:

Probably not. And best case eventual scenario probably ends up with someone like Bats running things. I think I'll take the politicians.

From:

Please.

From:

...I'm not sure if I'm impressed or horrified that you even tried that.

~~And I do not even want to know what exists out there about Arrowette. Ugh.~~

From:

It got worse than that. The reason we were trying to fit you in there is because there is a rumour (with more truth behind it than evidence) that Batman and Robin were there when Klarion turned Young Justice into adults and the JLA and JSA all into teenagers. But even conspiracy theorists wouldn't buy a prematurely-aged you as Batman with a straight face.

~~The main conspiracy theory about you is that you and Mia are the same person. And that one or both of you are actually Olly's daughter.~~ Mostly you're below the radar. Except to the Old Justice Legacy Society. But no one pays them any attention at all.

From:

Oh god, that mess! So not sorry I missed out on that. And how did you even consider that idea with a straight face? I can't even hear it with one! Ha!

~~...Huh. I don't know about Mia, but... They've got the one right. But Ollie doesn't know.~~

Below the radar is good. Mom was never good at that. (They're still around?)

[OOC: My Cissie is Ollie's daughter, and she found out a few months ago--Tim told her, and Roy knows, but she hasn't been ready to talk to Ollie yet. And now, with Roy granted guardianship, Cissie thinks it's even stickier. ;)]

From:

Most of the book wasn't considered with a straight face. And I suggested that on a night I'd been trying to drink with Helena and Zinda.

~~Mia isn't.~~

No actual members of Old Justice are actually in the OJLS.

[OOC: I (and Babs) knew she was Ollie's daughter (it's pretty much cannon in YJ) - but didn't realise Tim had told her]

From:

::laughs:: That sounds like fun. Trying to drink?

~~...Okay.~~

...So who is?

[OOC: Heh, yeah, I will assume she is until canon says otherwise and then I'll think they lie. ;) But yes, the way we played it was that Cissie found out her birth dad was someone other than the dad she remembers and Tim--being unable to let anything go--found out who. But waited to tell her until she was ready to hear it, which took a while. Cissie's mainly waiting to contact Ollie because she doesn't want to be a minor when she does it.]

From:

Helena's an Italian Catholic. And I've seen Zinda try to drink Barda under the table. Didn't quite succeed, but was close enough that Barda needed three tries to make it out the door. By their standards I'm a lightweight.

And the OJLS was ex-heroes that almost no one would have heard of (unlike OJ itself - Merry was one of my heroes when I was young) that were planned for support for OJ eventually. No need to pay any attention to them - half a dozen of them became close friends from that and have dinner with each other once a month. And called themselves the OJLS and put out the occasional press release (that no one ever reprints) because that way they get their dinner paid for by the same people who were using Old Justice and never got round to taking their tiny expense account away.

From:

::laughs:: Gotcha.

Huh. That doesn't quite seem right.

From:

Welcome to the wonderful world of Astroturf Politics (like Grass Roots Politics, but fake).

From:

shortpantsrobin.livejournal.com

Bats did worse. He didn't take it, but I was nice enough to take it for him.

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Disorder:	Very High
Schizoid Disorder:	Very High
Schizotypal Disorder:	Moderate
Antisocial Disorder:	High
Borderline Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Disorder:	Moderate
Narcissistic Disorder:	High
Avoidant Disorder:	Moderate
Dependent Disorder:	Low
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	High
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! -- -- Personality Disorders --

From:

mrsarcastic003

Dick--you're the best.

From:

shortpantsrobin.livejournal.com

*grin* Why, thank you!

From: